Alexandria Hotel AKA
April 27, 2026
My friend Steph Vogel is at it again, rebooing a hotel. This time the crufty old Holiday Inn is getting repurposed as an AKA. We are not really the right demographic here as we are completely allergic to hamster cages. But lots of people getting married are the right demographic.
You can tell Steph is in charge because the staff is excellent and friendly and fun. But honestly we don’t believe Steph exists. He has been replaced by an LLM.
We were in a king deluxe with a lil balcony overlooking the late night wedding reception. 200-something. But hey, things are just as super slick as they are very rectangular.
We were properly greeted with a nice note and some delicious chocolates.
No sign of plastic in the bathroom which is a fine design.
Anyway. We were here for Florence and the Machine. Early dinner at The Magestic was great. Their cocktail progrem is top notch.
Midnight in Manhattan
Saffron Spirit
The show was fun (lots of pics and vids here).
Breakfast at Milk and Honey was just fine but nothing to write home about.
Four showerheads (which for a property like this is as high as it gets) for the AKA in Alexandria. Time for Steph to take over a Penisula in Tokyo!
When In Bruges: Relais Bourgondisch Cruyce Hotel
March 4, 2026
Surely you’ve seen In Bruges?! Well we have, and we saw it again before the big birthday trip just for good measure. This is the very hotel featured in the movie.
In person, Relais Bourgondisch Cruyce Hotel is much more sedate and refined. No guns. No child murderers. No rooms full of crazy parties with cocaine and hookers. Darn.
We are actually on a scouting expedition for our return in July. Here’s what we learned.
Room 25 is the one we want. This time we were in 20, which is a very nice room that overlooks the canal but is a smidge small and has extremely limited closet space. So we looked at all the other rooms and 15 and 25 are the new targets.
Room 20 is the one on the right on the second floor where we stayed this time.
And what is that? Real klimt on the wall?? Yup. Lots of real pictures.
No wait really is that a Matisse?
Yes and in fact there is another on the wall in room 20.
We arrived so early that we simply dropped our bags and walked over to hop on a boat. We lulled Madou into a false sense of security by visting 5 previous times and never doing anything touristy. Bwahahaha!
This time he rode the boat.
We even made him climb the tower! But then he ran away, leaving us to explore on our own before returning with reinforcements for dinner.
What a view.
Euro-bathroom might kill you if you are a lawyer.
The breakfast room is very nice, but our quick hit did not include time for that. We were up way too early to take the direct train to Brussels airport (about 90 minutes and very easy) and fly home. The logistics of being in Bruge are excellent on that front.
Dinner at Republiek was great, especially with the entire gang. There was also mandatory ice cream.
All in all Bruges is very much a tourist town, smelling faintly of sugar and clogged up with lost people walking in circles. But it is worth a visit, if not just to drag Madou up the tower.
Four showerheads for Relais Bourgondisch Cruyce Hotel, a romantic little gem hidden among the droves.
Amsterdam Gem and Dining Haven: Hotel Okura
March 4, 2026
Usually Japanese five star hotels have something to teach the world about hospitality. Impeccable staffs. Modern design. Fine dining. The Okura has it all…almost. So close.
We were assigned room 2009, a junior suite (with an emphasis on junior). The room includes a beautiful canal view over the city, a closet that is slightly too small with too few hangers and that insists on closing itself, an HVAC system with a mind of its own, and a rectangular design familiar to hamsters everywhere. But the bathroom is nice. The shower is glass excellence. The toilet is properly complicated with its own remote control. The TV remains off. And the bed is comfortable.
When the couch and the bed are separated by a desk, you may apparently declare yourself a suite.
There was a personalized note.
The bathroom is very well appointed but architecturally stuck in hyatt mode. That beige is so HOA.
But the shower? Yes please.
Our check in was facilitated by a young woman who was in over her head. Could we arrange a boat ride? The public internet says no when she clicks a website or two. But then the concierge gets word of it and a private boat does indeed appear. Training training. I wonder if we might have scored an upgrade had someone else checked us in.
We stashed our stuff in the too small closet, phoning down for some hangers.
First some oysters. Our experience at Serre was marred by one loud talking Flemish businessman on his phone—the only other table in the restaurant. The staff, being utterly powerless to intervene, helped us switch tables. Why were we the ones to switch? Management would probably know, but there wasn’t any.
At 7pm we met our captain in the lobby for a boat ride just after dark. Absolutely excellent. We had champagne. We saw Amsterdam in a new light. The Okura has its own docking.
On birthday morning, Romey put cards everywhere. One or two showed up only the next day! So sweet. Like a banana.
The excellent hosts at breakfast knew all about our birthday too. In fact, the breakfast staff (even the flummoxed one who we lied to on the last day) were all very good. We were greeted by name each morning. There was a cake (this became a theme of the trip with four cakes all told).
Then it was off with Noelie and Lisa for a walk through town. Followed by the BIG SURPRISE which somehow Noelie and I kept secret for several months (a new record for us)…Florence and the Machine at the Ziggo.
The show was excellent and was our real reason for being in Amsterdam.
Sadly on birthday night, after our delayed return from the Ziggo, we were turned away on 23 WELL BEFORE CLOSING by a persnickety French guy. We did not like this one bit. It was all papered over later by Markus Vennemann who got to the bottom of it all over email. But really. Do better Okura.
We went to a dive bar instead and had a great time teaching the young bartender how to make a Toronto and a General’s Orders (after we sent him to the back to dig out the Fernet). Much fun was had.
All in all, 23 was great. Paul remembered Noelie from 9 years earlier. And our server Jean-Paul who greeted Romey and me on the first evening before the boat ride was just outstanding.
We even had a reunion.
It was downstairs after several martinis to Yamazato—the Japanese restaurant still in very high regard (and one of Florence’s favorites from years gone by. We had so much fun that the wait staff was not quite sure what to do with us.
The next morning came quite early, this day slated for a visit to the Rijkmuseum (somehow we need to remember not to go here) and the excellent modern art at the Moca. (We were too late to pull the trigger for Van Gogh, but we will be back and it will still be there.)
Breakfast was once again delightful. But by far the most fun part of the day before dinner was removing the TikTok girls from posing on the window ledge bench. So much fun. “Zero friends, zero likes?! What the hell??”
A second highlight of the trip and one of the best meals of a lifetime happened next. The chef’s table at Ciel Bleu is an experience not to miss. Chef Arjan Speelman is a super genius. He is also a genuinely nice person.
A planned visit to Door 74 was postponed due to utter bliss.
The next day we drove to Lichtervelde with Madou at the wheel, refamiliarizing ourselves with the bleating of sheep.
All told the Okura was a very good base of operations for our Amsterdam birthday leg. We would issue five showerheads, but it’s almost closing time. So four stars and some training improvement requested by management. Is there management? We may return.
Ciel Bleu is Exceptional
March 3, 2026
(cross-posted on apothecaryshed)
Executive Chef Arjan Speelman at Ciel Bleu is a great guy. Not only is he running one of the best of 417 two star restaurants (in 26 countries), but his kitchen exhibits a relaxed intensity that only comes from years of practice and absolute top notch management skille. The restaurant is a machine. Not the kind of machine that grinds you up…the kind that nurtures you and teaches you and sets you up to make something out there like it. You can feel this when you are present. And, damn can you taste it.
Mastery of the highest order. Watch out waterside, here they come.
Anyway, we were just damn lucky enough to have my 60th birthday dinner of note with Chef Speelman. Not in the gorgeous dining room, but in the kitchen itself at the chef’s table. And not just drive by chef, but engaged and fun chef who plays along, talks to us about things, and even allows us to interject some Florence and the Machine into the soundtrack. An experience of a lifetime to be sure.
Every minute was a delight. Every bite was worth talking about. Even the butter was better. The people creating this experience were so genuine and so psyched that we were having so much fun.
Thank you chef.
Madou is hitting on my wife. He’s single you know.
The chef’s table is IN the kitchen at the cold station side.
Presentation in a tuna bone.
A wall of stars. We think three is in order.
Did someone forget to serve Madou his wine?
Butter delivery by our German hostess. This young woman was outstanding in all respects. Her repartee was unmatched and hilarious.
The uni mouse is exquisite. For a long time this was best in our book.
Red mullet with skin so delicious
OMG pidgeon has no picture but so amazing.
Roe buck.
Pre dessert
Cocoa nut husk delivery with dry ice. This was as delicious as it was ridiculous.
Sadly the women had to retreat, but we finished up without them.
Once again, thank you chef.
Hey wait, who is that??!
A fitting birthday celebration.
Cowper Inn: Palo Alto Can’t Stack Up
February 7, 2026
After wining and dining in LA, and lunch in Santa Barbara, Palo Alto left something to be desired. Maybe it was just a letdown after seeing what has become of the Georgian in Santa Monica. The Cowper Inn has shrunk, leaving no room for common areas, no chance to congregate with others (unless you opt to go say hi to Joji in person), no breakfast, and sadly no new room updates. I guess the NPS Cowper days are officially behind us.
I mean, this little room with its own entrance is nice enough (though too small to work in). And the shower is OK (though man was it too cold for the property this visit). But no common areas means too much time at the Blue Bottle. I am not a grad student.
But it is walkable to everywhere in Palo Alto. And the yard still has amazing trees.
One bonus was birthday dinner with Nikil.
.
Of course we sang!
Blue bottle good. Bistro Maxine about as shitty as it gets. BIML meetings were all excellent.
Anyway, silicon valley is falling behind. I guess everyone has moved into their compounds and left only Stanford students wondering where the hell everybody went.
Two showerheads and an empty bag of nostalgia for the Cowper Inn. It was great…long ago.
The Georgian is IT Again: Santa Monica’s Hippest Hangout
February 7, 2026
This is the sort of thing that probably happens to the Georgian once every 20 years or so—a nice facelift and a house full of hipsters. Built in 1933 or so, the ages come in waves. The sun is back up at the Georgian.
Last time NPS was here, things were at stasis. But not this time! This time there was an art opening attended by so many people that they didn’t fit. And there was a line on Friday night for the new nightclub downstairs. Who knew? And the bar was always hopping.
I was assigned an excellent backwards facing suite on the 4th floor. The parking garage view is not to die for.
There were cookies and a personalized note.
There was an old school bar.
There was a living room.
And the shower? Excellent.
Breakfast at Cora’s (a tradition now) was great.
R2 was great this iteration. A blast to see everyone and drink wine together. This time there was so much extra wine that we left two cases to the wait staff for “the best tip we ever had.”
Later we went to see the sunset in the city.
And we had a secret tiki cocktail at Tail O the Pup’s hidden Lucky Tiki.
Finally Rivers Family dinner at Escuela was great.
An all around excellent visit, five showerheads, some energy, and a big mass of hipsters at the Georgian. We’ll be back.
The Wilmina in Berlin: A Design Gem
January 16, 2026
Our train across Germany to Berlin was easy and fast, and we arrived at sunset. Our Berlin welcome involved drizzle. The Wilmina glowed with welcome.
Room 107 is a garden view room, spacious and clean, but configured for handicap access.
Each room in the hotel was adapted from some aspect of a historical women’s prison.
Though the shower was not plastic, it was not glass either. It was mostly too big.
What a property.
The bar is something to write home about. Absolute world class excellence with house made infusions and highly creative cocktails. Best hotel bar in Germany for sure.
Time for some reading by the fire.
The associated bakery.
We were only in Berlin for a short while, but we crammed in some great food, some excellent company, and some art. Seri Melayu was a nice reprive from brown food. The House of Small Wonder lives up to its reputation. Itarei was good but needs a service and wine overhaul.
Four showerheads leaning hard into five for the Wilmina. If we find the right room, the rating will improve.
The Proper in Austin Texas Thinks Big About Itself
December 25, 2025
We flew in to see Billy Strings play some old school blue grass at Austin City Limits. There was almost enough time to relax before dinner at the Peacock (which is very good indeed). The Proper is a nice hotel, and likely the best one in Austin, but it’s not quite as nice as they seem to think it is. Oh those Texans.
We were assigned a king balcony room 714 overlooking the unused pool. The day we arrived in Texas it was 37 degrees (which in Texas is way below freezing).
Not one speck of plastic in the shower. The bathroom is a little too small.
View of the pool on a cold winter day. It was even too cold to use the balcony.
And then it was time for Billy Strings to pick a few. (Lots of pictures and videos from the show here.)
Late night at Goldies. So secret the front desk even thinks it’s closed.
While in Austin we had an excellent breakfast at the well and then walked to Imogene + Willie and maufrais.
And then, it was time to fly home.
Four showerheads and a smaller hat for the proper. It’s awful hard to get five.
Hotel Monaco Pittsburgh with Billy Strings and Bear
November 11, 2025
As you may recall, we got married this May (on five fives) and the hotel Monaco was our base of operations. We have a special place in our hearts for Pittsburgh and for the Monaco. Our most recent visit did not disappoint.
I mean not only were we in town to see Billy Strings play two great shows. We also chatted with Billy Strings himself and his dog Bear in the elevator. He is a sweet guy and his dog is awesome. The encounter made us miss our own goldendoodle, Maybelline, even more.
Since the band was in town and there was at least one wedding full of fraternity type people in the house, there were no suites to be had at reservation time. That is, unless Rob Malinger is pulling strings for you. Always have Rob pull strings. He is all powerful! We were put in 318 this time.
Which like most Monaco suites features lots of room, a cool bathroom, and a birdcage (of the sort that apparently flummoxes Madou).
Sydney wrote us a nice note and had an amenity placed in our room. Thanks Sydney.
The shower in 318 has its own internal bathtub.
Getting in and out of the hotel was “fucktangular” this visit. When we arrived it was rush hour and raining. And there were idiots from Tennessee with very huge jeep wagoneers (but no actual moxy) trying to lead us into the left. After waiting 8 lights we just went around them and taught them how to turn left on red. LOL. Then on Saturday morning we had to refactor our breakfast plans when the car took over two hours to get from the parking lot to the valet stand (due to a veterans day parade). It really was not awful but it was also not convenient. Only in Pittsburgh.
We headed straight to dinner when we arrived so we could get to the show. The mushroom thing at the Commoner is great. The show was very good indeed. So fun to be with our Billy Strings expert Betty.
We had some coffee at De Fer before the commoner was open.
And we went to the Mattress Factory for a dose of contemporary art.
And Randyland of course…
Then it was back to Billy after a very early dinner at Ritual House. Betty was in true outstanding leadership mode for this one. We secured some special bands and entered in the first 100 to hang with the true Billy fans. One fella had seen 333 shows! The people were really welcoming and friendly. And yeah, they knew all the songs and everyone around us. It was great. We owe Betty a big one now.
After each show we had a night cap in the Commoner and met some fellow Billy enthusiasts. Great bar.
On Sunday we made our leisurely way to Gepetto for breakfast, the headed out through Maggie’s Farm Distillery.
Five showerheads and special dispensation for the Monaco. Pittsburgh just gets better and better.
The Rosewood São Paulo: Excellence and the Disney Effect
September 23, 2025
First of all, the Rosewood is a gorgeous facility, centrally located in São Paulo and yet somehow an oasis of sorts. Two blocks from the main drag (Av. Paulista), as soon as you enter the driveway you enter a different world, lush and green like the jungle. Having an oasis to retreat to from the chaotic third world aspects of São Paulo is a necessity when you are old and spoiled.
344 is a luxury king category that is almost sufficient for several days. The best aspect is a balcony that overlooks the real street. In case you wonder whether you are actually in a big city, a look out the window banks makes that clear. Fortunately the room is seriously soundproofed.
The bathroom is awesome with nary a plastic shower in sight. In fact, the shower controls are complex enough to require a manual.
The bar and coffee center went unused.
We spent some time at the pool, meeting people sadly from Florida (or as from Florida as you can get when you are a french boat designer with a Russian designer wife
The only issue that needs attention at the Rosewood may, ironically, be that the staff is a bit too well trained. Lots of them are Disney alums, and it shows in the way they execute the script. Less script and more human would fit the vibe of Brazil better.
We experienced our first Brazilian live music at Cabo de Galo, a supposedly “secret” mixology speakeasy directly in the middle of the breakfast restaurant. Part of the Disneyesque script is to insert an unnecessary delay in all productions in order to give the illusion of exclusivity; like waiting for an open table to be open; or waiting to be seated at breakfast when open tables are all over the place. That stitch can be dropped.
Hell? Maybe.
We enjoyed some cashaça. (Throughout Brazil, the argument WRT whose cashaça is best continues apace even 20 years after my first visit.)
And a Brazilian cocktail involving not enough Fernet called macunaíma.
Greater São Paulo outside the Rosewood oasis has plenty to offer. Some things we saw before our arrival at the Rosewood, like the Jardim Botânico and Esperanza Spalding.
Our post-business side quests included some time in Liberdade at the open market (pretty down scale to be honest).
Av. Paulista. is close by and on Sunday the road is closed to traffic. The MASP (day one) (and MASP (day two)) are very close by indeed. Pinacoteca de São Paulo is a quick car ride away in the rain, and it is open on Monday.
We experienced an incredible dinner (among the best in the world) at DOM.
All in all, five showerheads for the Rosewood. An excellent, though slightly too Disney, experience. We will return.
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