Heavy Turbulence at the Alexis in Seattle
June 4, 2017
NPS is not a first-timer at the Alexis, but we sure do miss our guy Keith (once concierge) who is no longer at Kimpton. Because we have no feet on the ground at the hotel, we had to rely on social media and the CRM system that Kimpton uses to track its guests. Guess what? Knowing people beats the heck out of any computer-based guest database. Especially a guest database that elides the only real hotel room criteria we hold dear.
Which is a short way of saying, “WTF Kimpton, a room with a plastic shower??!” Really, the warm greeting by Sam, the sparkling water, the really beautiful newly-renovated room, all that stuff means not a thing if the shower is plastic. We’ll pay more. We’ll do pretty much whatever it takes to avoid the shower over bathtub thing. We’ll even cash in our loyalty and find a different hotel.
NO PLASTIC SHOWERS!
The first room was 634. It had a plastic shower. What exactly does that mean, you ask? Lets review.
We tried to make this all very obvious.
Yuck. Let's review @Kimpton Alexis:
no plastic showers
No obesity bars
No plastic curtains pic.twitter.com/7JL1KE7IGE— noplasticshower (@noplasticshower) June 1, 2017
Does the machine have a memory??
Sounds like there was a mix-up, gem, but we've got you covered tomorrow. Don't cry in that WLW, it'll ruin the balance. ;)
— Kimpton (@Kimpton) June 1, 2017
So lets put this shower episode behind us and hope somebody out there in Kimpton CRM-land is paying attention.
Sparkling water is always very nice, and we do appreciate that.
But we do not at all like this trend where our rooms are bugged. Please make these spy devices that invade privacy optional Kimpton.
Anyway, for the record, the Alexis has a great little bar called The Library, where from time to time great bourbon flows through.
We will now cry in our William Larue Weller pic.twitter.com/kAR22ZTjOs
— noplasticshower (@noplasticshower) June 1, 2017
2016 weighs in at 135.4 proof pic.twitter.com/X0BEiTBFHW
— noplasticshower (@noplasticshower) June 1, 2017
Willet 23 does not perform pic.twitter.com/2BJDwdsCIo
— noplasticshower (@noplasticshower) June 1, 2017
The next morning, a room adjustment was already underway. That is good. But it was already too late.
Breakfast at Biscuit Bitch is worth seeking out, even if you have to trawl for a table.
Breakfast @biscuitbitch seattle. The one with no seats. Suck it. pic.twitter.com/c1m02p4ZMk
— noplasticshower (@noplasticshower) June 1, 2017
And then work. And then some sailing.
We did some racing, and the good news is that we won first place in our class (really great huge boats that start late and come in last).
By the time the ferry shenanigans finished up, it was midnight and time for the room switch. Imagine our surprise when told that the water was off for maintenance. The Alexis can’t win for losing this trip. We were assigned room 425 which was very nice. We spent 5 hours in it all told.
Though we really do appreciate the shower in room 425, it works better when the water is on.
LOL. Great glass shower @kimpton Alexis. Just please don't turn it on. pic.twitter.com/srDSCDaWJ3
— noplasticshower (@noplasticshower) June 2, 2017
The staff left a very nice amenity which there was no time to get into. Sadly, the water was not sparkly, though who knows it might have started out that way hours earlier.
The bathroom is very spacious and awesome. Wish there were more time to use it properly.
All told this chunky visit to the Alexis deserves three showerheads on average. Plastic showers bring your final semester grade way down here at NPS university.