Stuck in Texas: The Dallas Hotel Zaza
April 1, 2023
Imagine there is no worse airline than United domestic? Think again! American Airlines pulled absolute garbage service on my last trip. First some background.
A last minute talk opportunity popped up and the hosts promised to pay for a business class day trip. So the plan was to fly into Dallas at 9am (departing the house at 5:15am) and get home before 10pm. Ha!
The talk was great and the day was going smoothly, and then American Airlines operations just FUBARed things up. I mean wow. First there was the drip delay supposedly cause by weather (there was no weather), then there was a plane and no crew, then the crew landed at a gate 40 minutes away, and then, the coup de grace, the captain timed out and walked away. Leaving 300 or so people stranded in Dallas all wanting to get to Washington DC.
American, after some real delay during which I purchased a seat on the only United flight to Dulles the next day, “rebooked” me on puddle hoppers through some tiny ass Ohio town and into DCA. Nope. I flew United the next day and burned 24 hours.
American Airlines had a hard time accepting my rejiggering as reality. After a couple of hours of bullshit and waiting 10 days, they refunded my original business class leg. They had to be forced to do that. No more American Airlines for me!
Anyway, Hotel Zaza in Dallas came up during a cursory search for hip hotels. And off I went, arriving around 10pm…ironically the same time I was due to be in my own bed at home.
I think I was assigned 418. Of course no clothes and no bathroom amenities were with me.
At least the shower was top notch.
Here is the free bathroom stuff you get for your money. Yuck.
Finding a cocktail nearby at 11 was a thing. Even super barman Jacques was at a loss and sorry I was stuck in Dallas. LOL.
The car service at Zaza was good and was more than willing to drive me 4 blocks in style.
The Kennedy room (above) was a dive serviced by kids who were utterly clueless. Don’t even bother. Beau Nash looked promising, but closed at 11pm on a Wednesday. So it was off to the Tipsy Alchemist on a tip from the bartender at Beau Nash.
Though I was the wrong demographic being over 35, the cocktails were well made, and there was real bourbon in the house. Needless to say, insanity reigned after too many shots, but I somehow woke up back at the hotel in the morning. So that was good.
Actual real Weller in the house.
After a somewhat late breakfast at the hotel (pretty not bad, but also unremarkable), a visit to the Dallas Art Museum was in store.
I felt kind of like the picture above. DFW airport was still a pit. Overcrowded and old. The United gates are way better than the American worn out 80s mall gates through.
Three showerheads for the Zaza. Lets just skip Dallas from now on.
Three tacos in Pheonix
December 18, 2022
When United fucks up ops, they do it spectacularly. NPS was headed to phoenix for a meeting. The four hour flight delay (equipment related on a route that has no other backups) caused us to land after the meeting was over. Just ridiculous.
So we did a post meeting rendez-vous and headed to Scottsdale for a taco.
I almost forgot. Dulles was all dressed up for the holidays.
And it was a complete zoo. Security was packed. This is the TSApre line.
Scottsdale fountain with a Belgian photo bomb.
Tourist tacos for the win. And a margerita too, of course.
We admired the lights and did some sock shopping in town.
FAST
SLOW
Finally we swung by the Westin in Tempe for a fantastic Negroni. Who knows why, but that hotel bar is one of the best in town?!
Anyway, United still sucks.
Quick Hit in NYC: Hotel Indigo is Very Corporate
October 17, 2022
What was to be a long weekend in the city shrunk down to one night when business did its usual thing of melting away. NPS stayed on the lower east side on somewhat of a whim. The verdict? Meh.
Thing is, Madou had no idea that we weren’t in midtown. So we shlepped up there for sushi at Sushi by Bou. Which was hilarious and definitely worth the subway time.
Waygu and uni…surf and turf @mmadou pic.twitter.com/BBZUfT75ih
— noplasticshower (@noplasticshower) September 7, 2022
The place is tiny, so make a reservation. Immediately after coffee, it was back downtown for our meetings, and then back to midtown for dinner at Freemans. Dinner was great.
But skip the rice pudding fad! LOL. Ride pudding is way too filling to catch on.
After dinner, the plan was to wedge into PDF, but the hot dog place was being its persnickety self. So instead we headed to Amor Y Amargo for some fantastic cocktails. We made up an experimental cocktail called the McGillicutty.
The Indigo was generic and boring. All of the Kimpton magic has dispersed.
The shower is not plastic.
The lower east side is close to some stuff, we guess.
NPS doesn’t remember the room number. Not returning.
Back to EWR you go (in an early Uber).
The United club is all new and fancy, but the flights are still delayed.
All told, three showerheads and no more strikes for Kimpton. Anybody have a good boutique hotel chain to offer?
Lets Compare Airlines: 6 Trips Across the Pond, Summer 2022
August 5, 2022
We knew it was a very silly plan when we dreamed it up. We just didn’t know HOW silly. In any case, the very silly plan involved crossing the Atlantic six times this summer, which provided a nice opportunity to compare business class travel on three distinctly different airlines.
The verdict? Swiss Air wins hands down by miles. Then lufthansa comes in fifth of three. And united? Tenth of three. LOL. Not even close.
Here are more details.
The Lufthansa 747-8 upper deck is fun. The pods are not particularly roomy, but it is nice to have a dedicated business class bathroom or two and a distinctly private environment away from the scrum.
We flew to Frankfurt and got picked up in a red camaro.
Seat 85C on the upper deck of a @lufthansa B747-8. pic.twitter.com/10gyj7dZN6
— noplasticshower (@noplasticshower) June 23, 2022
Some of the time was spent in Heidelberg.
A train took us to the airport to depart Germany. Getting a train directly into Frankfurt airport is very easy and convenient.
The flight back on a Lufthansa A330-300 was more cramped than the 747-800 and really was not as nice. Not a big fan of the airbus. Much less room to get comfortable.
Pod 3C on @lufthansa A330-300. Back across the pond (crossing 2 of 6 this summer) pic.twitter.com/hPKCgarak2
— noplasticshower (@noplasticshower) June 30, 2022
We flew back to experience the closing of the digital psychedelic art show and to give a talk for the locals about Machine Learning Security. (Always keep your promises!)
And then it was a ridiculous two day turnaround to fly to Milan (through Frankfurt again). This equipment sure seems familiar! Upstairs again for a flight that was late once again but very comfortable.
Pod 84H on @lufthansa B747-8. Late as usual. The plan is to sleep. pic.twitter.com/NVmjCT0EPX
— noplasticshower (@noplasticshower) July 2, 2022
We did some music in Italy.
My art face. LOL.
The art itself: Into the Unknown.
Since my flight from Milano to Zurich was cancelled (Swiss Air has decided not to fly the northern Italian routes any more), I opted for the fast train through the alps. Just beautiful and very fast. The only issue was all the stuff I had (a huge guitar, a violin, a mandolin, a tube of art and a big roller bag).
Getting all the stuff on the train to Zurich and finally getting a taxi to the airport was a thing. The Zurich train station was under construction and a pain in the ass to negotiate. Finding the taxi stand was a serious challenge and nobody seemed to want to help.
Dang pic.twitter.com/q0pFcZFwC5
— noplasticshower (@noplasticshower) June 30, 2022
So we were grumpy, but everything was very smooth at Zurich airport in spite of our SSSS security status. TIronically, the SSSS actually speeded me through security faster. And a surprize upgrade came through!
Upgraded on a Swiss Air hop to Boston! Wow. The seat was enormous and the service was a blast! Best by far.
Even the food was great. Like you might even eat it not on an airplane.
Upgraded to first from business. Well that helps. Thanks @FlySWISS. Pod (living room?) 1D on a swiss air pic.twitter.com/iU3Rnd76AY
— noplasticshower (@noplasticshower) July 15, 2022
Actual espresso macchiatto
Standard issue mimosa.
What to do with all this room on the card table sized table? Wine tasting!
The crew was a blast (see more below).
The food was delicious and not overcooked.
Cheese for dessert.
Even Grappa.
The silliest thing that happened in all of these cross-Atlantic hops was the wine tasting. Since the card table sized table was so huge we decided to fill it up. Much fun was had.
So it was off to NH for a day to play music, and then a hop down to repack suitcases through Dulles.
Poor moonshine was sad to see me go again.
Finally the time came to take some actual United business class flights. This plan was a B767-400. The pods are a bit tight and the service is nowhere near as good as lufthansa or Swiss Air. On our way to Madrid, our flight attendant was unable to remember that we requested expedited service. And god forbid you know that you can request slippers and an extra pad for sleeping!
Headed to Spain in @united pods 5A and B. Polaris for the win. pic.twitter.com/axh7ugRrCG
— noplasticshower (@noplasticshower) July 17, 2022
We’re spoiled and we know it. Madrid and Barcelona were great.
We postponed our return trip in order to shake the COVID that we caught in Spain. Other than the trip was magical.
On the way home, the crew was better than on the way out (though the captain was the same and she played the same beach boys music). All in all, United was inferior service on all fronts.
Time to step it up, united!
Pods 5A and 5B on @united B767-400 in Polaris finally on our way home pic.twitter.com/YQin6U4uz9
— noplasticshower (@noplasticshower) July 29, 2022
Moonshine was happy to have us home!
The Hotel Van Zandt Austin, Texas
January 19, 2022
Ah Kimpton, you’ve become so corporate. Such a great hotel chain ground down by middle management cost cutting and the boredom of crank turning. Dang. We remember the old days, yes we do. They are never coming back.
Anyway, getting to Texas on United was not so bad even in double masks. The flight was very sparsely populated, though it is a longish one. Austin is a great city to visit. Or is it a town? Kind of hard to tell. Here’s the story of our brief stay at Hotel Van Zandt.
First of all, IHG has forgotten everything about what NPS likes. Just for the record, we like high floors, certain kinds of pillows, and rooms with no plastic showers. We have also become accustomed to welcome notes from the GM, delicious amenities, sparkling water, and sometimes even a craft cocktail greeting us in the room from a barkeep hired by Jacques. Not this time. Even though the Kimpton twitter dwarf (they used to be fairies, but corporations) was given the heads up, not one bit of prep was done. Kind of astonishing, really.
So NPS paid a pretty penny for an excellent king spa room with a view, and was given a plastic bottle of water at checkin by the Assistant Manager who had obviously not read our secret file in preparation for our arrival. Hell, there probably isn’t a secret file anymore.
Room 701 is a great room style category. But the floor? Not a high one. The amenities and water? Nope. And the “lake view” is mostly a dusty construction site surrounded by homeless encampments. Seriously. Every city we’ve visited lately has a massive housing problem. What is wrong with this country?
The bathroom was awesome. Great tub (which we used a bunch) and a nice glass shower.
The king size bed is surrounded by a bank of windows on two sides. The view will one day be better.
Given our late arrival sometime just after 8pm, we headed for a drink to Geraldine’s on the fourth floor. It was a Saturday night and the unmasked Texas crowd was dense. After ordering an outstandingly made Negroni (what ice! what ingredients!) we opted for dinner. Dinner was delicious, service was smart and snappy, and all was well with the world. There was a band. They were OK.
Sadly the restaurant was not open for breakfast during our stay. Instead there is a starbucks knockoff cafe on the ground floor with a microwave. Not the sign of a great hotel, guys. Frankly, the place feels more like a Marriott than a Kimpton. No human touch and no magic.
Sunday was devoted to fun without a plan. Brunch at Fixe was absolutely stellar. Great Bloody Mary’s and cinnamon roll biscuits. Fantastic food and friendly Texas service. We took our time.
In a great mood and in weather befitting Spring (60 degrees), we headed to South Congress for some idle shopping. Our only real destination was Heritage Boot Company. Though we got no pictures, we did manage to pick up a knife for my kilt and three pairs of handmade boots. We even had a margarita of sorts with “Mr. Avocado.” Great people, great boots, and a down home Texas vibe. (Thanks Kimber.) NPS hears tell that once you buy one pair you are on a slippery slope to ten. We shall see.
We did manage to singlehandedly support the American economy with our credit cards. And then it was time for a margarita and some music at Half Step. The margaritas are on tap. We were served by Nick Cage himself.
Margarita @halfstepbar served by nick cage himself @LoveTequila @rivco pic.twitter.com/PYH26aasFP
— noplasticshower (@noplasticshower) January 16, 2022
And that band. Three blind fellows joined by two sighted musicians and a heap of funk. These were real Austin professionals.
Have a listen for yourself.
About the time we extracted we were late for our dinner reservation at Canje. Dinner was excellent. The jerk chicken was hotter than hell. The drinks were fun. The vibe was casual.
Really it would be hard to ask for a better Sunday in Austin.
Monday was a work day with a working lunch at Qi. Get the soup dumplings.
Part of the late afternoon meeting happened at the Proper hotel. This place is interesting but just a little too artificial after an hour in the lobby. The music loop may kill you if the extruded ice doesn’t. Dinner was slated for upstairs at la piscina ceviches and fajitas. Our hosts are enamored with their fajitas. They were (as Sammy says) pretty not bad.
The highlight of the evening Monday night was a quick stop by the Roosevelt Room. What a place. Cavernous and somehow still intimate. Superb cocktails served with whimsy and great care. One of the top bars in the world for sure. NPS had a paper plane (with a paper plane) and a Liberal. Yup. Amer Picon in the house. We seem to have lost our party all night energy during the pandemic, especially after a full day of working in person. So we’ll have to go back. Thanks for the hospitality Justin.
Well, Austin, we will definitely be back. We’ll probably buy some more Heritage boots. We’ll definitely have a few more drinks at the Roosevelt Room. But we’ll stay at the Driskill. Three showerheads for the Hotel Van Zandt where you get what you pay for (and nothing more).
San Francisco Post Pandemic
June 27, 2021
How exactly do you get back on the horse after a year of not even being in the barn? Or remembering you’re on a farm? Or much of anything? Well, we’re well on our way to finding out. In all honesty the first post pandemic trip (to Mobile, Alabama) was so shocking that we skipped the blogging aspect entirely. Culture shock, people shock, and total documentation whiff. Great trip…but so rusty.
Here we are in California visiting friends we have not seen in just over two years. Dang. Actual humans not in our pod! We really missed them.
The first order of business was getting on an airplane. And of course, United was the default choice. We took a look at the trips put in deep freeze way back in February 2020, pulled one out of the freezer, and thawed it out. Other than the mask mandate, things are pretty much the same on a cross country B787 flight. The waffle thing was terrible. I mean serve Eggos for goodness sake.
Flying on a @united B787 dreamliner in Polaris pod 3B. First class is not full. pic.twitter.com/yKbXE26lJF
— noplasticshower (@noplasticshower) June 21, 2021
The coolest thing about coming to California from Virginia has always been how much time you get back on the way out. By flying at 7:30am, not only is Dulles completely empty and easy to navigate in the morning, arrival at SFO happens around 9:30am.
It was off in an airport taxi (SF cabs STILL suck) for a tag in at Doug and Laura’s new house in the city near Golden Gate park. What a find! The showers are not plastic, the dogs are friendly (if a bit stinky) and the friends are priceless.
Lunch at Crepevine was a little too huge. The fries are really good.
Then it was over the bridge to Oakland for some BIML business with Open Philanthropy. This bridge thing was to become a recurring theme on the San Francisco part of the trip. Then of all places Ruby Hill for a friendly business visit with Neil and some delicious sushi.
Neil has a new house. It gives a tour of itself. We opened the very first bottle of wine in the new house…an NPS honor. Sushi was ordered and served.
The neighborhood dive nearest to Doug and Laura’s is called the Fireside. The bartenders are friendly, and the drinks are, well, I had fernet every time, so who knows how the drinks are. If you are lucky, you will be privileged enough to buy a beer for a Nigerian prince. Or maybe just someone from Rhode Island.
Fireside bar fernet pic.twitter.com/CsMlivfW0O
— noplasticshower (@noplasticshower) June 22, 2021
Tuesday was an all day run up to Sonoma with Jacob. We started with some oysters at Tony’s Seafood. Amazingly, it rained on us. But that was OK, because the big tent kept us dry and boy does California need the rain.
After lunch (man was that bread good), it was up to Ridge Winery on mostly side roads. The drive was fast and beautiful. The sky began to dapple blue and soon the blue leaked into the clouds and covered the sky as we worked north.
Ridge is a great place to sit on a beautiful day and sip good wine from old vines. Delightful and recommended.
Ridge set a high bar, and one that Mazzocco could not reach. Great decor there, but nope on all other fronts.
Then it was back to the city for ramen at Iza Ramen. Yes please. Just go there. Wow. Real ramen like the before times.
A nightcap at Churchhill, which is a great old school bar. They used to sell the antique collection bourbons for way under retail price…sadly, they have figured out how much to charge now.
Finally, a late night with friends at 54 Mint. I really missed the energy of Jacques during the pandemic!
Then somehow it was Wednesday. We started with tacos at Underdog Tres, a romp in the Japanese garden, and a visit to the botanical gardens (the latter two in Golden Gate park).
We were joined by Dr.Chess.
Then after a brief respite at home, it was off to ABV for some world class cocktails where we finally met Chris in person.
Drinking with @noplasticshower at @ABV_SF! pic.twitter.com/z4bYrHuLLU
— MacCocktail (@MacCocktail) June 24, 2021
We tried to magic our way into State Bird Provision. But no dice. So it was back toward home for some peruvian food at Fresca.
Then back to the Fireside. This time there were zero African princes around.
Thursday was reserved for Alameda, the beach, and a sunburn (?!). It was a beautiful day over there once we got over the confounded bridge.
Everyone assembled at Blackbird for pre-dinner drinks at six. Blackbird had just re-opened (like everywhere else), and the permanent staff was as great as always.
Then, just to put a crown jewel on the day we walked over to Izakaya Rintaro for a world-class dinner that was as good as anything in the before times. Excellent food, fun service and great friends. Yup.
After a last showing at the Fireside bar, the San Francisco visit came to a close.
And it was off to Sonoma bright and early Friday morning.
Bloomington Done Right: The Grant Street Inn
January 17, 2020
You know how we feel here at NPS when it comes to generic hotels. The good news is that this trip (off season and not on a game weekend) the Grant Street Inn had our favorite room available. Needless to say, this place beats the heck out of the Hyatt Place.
So here we are in room 31. Sadly the fireplace has been disconnected and no longer functions. In fact, there are a few things that could use sprucing up…like better furnishings, no ancient radio, no phone that plugs into the wall, and some outlets built into the bedside table. You can do it guys!!
The first trip of 2020 started out great with a last minute upgrade from United who seems to have changed their upgrade policy to make things more nail biting for Global Services members. Not sure how we feel about that.
And then there was the hilarious stretch limo that the car service used to get us from Indy to Bloomington.
While in Bloomington, visit the Irish Lion for a stiff drink. And have some food at Anyetsang’s Little Tibet Restaurant.
The Grant Street remains our favorite location to stay in Bloomington. Four showerheads.